My First Bad Review

Well, folks, it's happened-- I got my first bad review. Up until this point in my theatrical career, I've prided myself on the fact that I've gotten consistently great reviews or special shout-outs in local papers for my performances in Rochester. However, that streak has ended with Leah Stacy's recent review of "It's A Wonderful Life: A Live Radio Play"for the Democrat & Chronicle. In otherwise glowing review of both the show and the individual performances of my peers, Miss Stacy dedicated an entire paragraph on my performance. Here's what she had to say about yours truly:

"Tiballi (Sally Applewhite/Mary Hatch Bailey) — who’s known locally for her strong musical performances, most recently in JCC CenterStage’s Working —seemed to struggle with her character development. The role of a 1940s radio starlet eclipsed the well-loved nature of Mary Hatch Bailey until the seductive looks, eye rolls thrown (too often) to the audience and coquettish tones completely marred the emotional gravity Tiballi could’ve grasped with such an iconic role."

<Rise above... rise above...>

I just have a few things to say (big surprise there- of course I do).

1) I am not Donna Reed. If you are coming to this show expecting to see people mimic the movie, you will be sorely disappointed.

2) Emotional gravity in the Mary Hatch Bailey role? As I see it, Mary is one of the least emotional characters in the piece. She is the rock that keeps George steady- it's HIS story, it's HIS struggle, it's HIS journey. She is there as the counterpoint, the one that quietly steps in throughout his arc, doing what she can to smooth the bumps along the way (offering the money from their wedding to bail out the Building & Loan, finding a place for them to live and making it a home, collecting money when Uncle Billy loses the $8,000). Was she expecting me to burst into tears? Mary isn't extreme like that- she can't be- that's not who that character is and none of her lines support that kind of emotional swing. Mary Bailey is playful and sassy ("He's making violent love to me, Mother", "Oooh why don't you just go home??" and her "to keep from being an old maid" response when George asks why she married him). I played the playfulness and sass where I felt it was appropriate for Mary Bailey while trying to make sure she was still a character that was lovable and good.

3) There are at least three stretches in"It's A Wonderful Life: A Live Radio Play" where I don't do anything for at least 10 pages. No lines. But I have to be onstage the entire time. And in a play of this format, it would be very easy to just do your thing at the microphone when you've got lines and then just go sit down on one of the cane-backed chairs and zone out until it's time for you to have some more lines. How boring! No thank you!

Sit like an effing lady

4) This is a radio play and our characters are actors who are playing these "iconic roles". How uninteresting would it be if Sally Applewhite (my "1940s actress" character) was the exact same thing as Mary Hatch Bailey (the character Sally is playing in the radio show)? So I made the decision (you know, back in the first rehearsals when I was working on said character development... that I supposedly struggled with) that Mary Bailey would be playful and sweet and lovable and good, but Sally Applewhite would be something else entirely. Using the clues given to me in the script (because that's what actors do when they develop their characters- I learned that when I was  majoring in theatre at college), I decided that Sally Applewhite, as a former beauty queen, would be very aware of the audience, and would therefore be very presentational in front of them. This would affect her posture (rules of ettiquette of the era were researched for this role-- straight back when sitting, chin up, hands clasped in your lap, legs never crossed but rather ankles crossed and tucked to one side), her appearance (heavy on the makeup- which was also researched for the time period), and her gestures (right down to the positioning of the pinky finger or the point of a toe- usually in a beveled position- while standing flirtaciously). Sally, as a young actress from Ohio who is now riding the wave of fame that came with her recent Hollywood feature "Dottie Goes Bananas", would have figured out that flirtation gets you everywhere in this business. She's the next hot young thing and she knows it (which perhaps explains a little bit of the tension and competition she feels toward Linda's character, an older and more established female star). Maybe she's eager to demonstrate this newfound tactic for getting attention, so she flirts with the audience-- why wouldn't she? She already knows that they're watching her- why not toss them a little something? She's no dummy- even though she's lending her voice to the radio, she's keenly aware that there's a studio audience to play with at the same time. In theatre, we talk about making strong choices. I thought it was more interesting and actually important for Sally and Mary to be completely different characters- it's more exciting for the audience, it's more fun for me as an actor (especially since I am one of the actors who doesn't get to play a bunch of different characters within the play). So I made that strong choice to provide a contrast between the character that I am (Sally) and the character that Sally was playing (Mary). Apparently, Leah didn't like that choice on how to play Sally (I think Leah wanted me to be Mary Hatch Bailey the entire time). Well, sorry but that's who Sally is- she's a seductive coquette, just like I wanted her to be. There's a part of me that's smugly satisfied that Leah used those specific words to criticize her because that's EXACTLY WHAT I WAS GOING FOR. Miss Stacy may not have agreed with my choice, but I succeeded in realizing that choice. You don't "struggle with character development" when you make strong choices- you struggle with it when you don't.

The most shocking part of all of this is that Miss Stacy is a fellow redhead. Shame on you, Miss Stacy- you know we have to stick together. You have betrayed the Sisterhood. I shun you for this, the most personal betrayal of all, for surely you should know better.

To read the entire review, click here. To purchase your tickets to the show so you can see what I'm talking about, click here.

Let's face it, I'm pooped!

Blazing Saddles quote for the win!

I felt the need to post again, friends, for I am still attempting to atone for my recent 6-month absence on Adorakle Gal. But as I sat at my desk, toiling to come up with a clever subject to rant/expound upon, I found that my mind-grapes seem to have shriveled into dried-up raisins. Such is the level of my current state of exhaustion...

...exhaustion...

...hmmm... perhaps I could write about my current state of exhaustion, indeed...

I proceeded to type "exhausted" into my browser's Bing image search, just to see if I could find a solitary image that spoke to my ass-dragginess today. What I saw was horrifying.

Here are some of the familiar faces of exhaustion, according to the interwebs:



Why do these feet have faces???



A sleepy skin suit?




I put this picture in this list for the sole reason that I hate squirrels. So very much.



Horrifying watermelon.



Questionable amputee toddler takes a weary break from swimming.



...excuse me?



Rodent jazz bands.



I think this (wo)man? ate Linda Carter.

It's A Wonderful Life: A Live Radio Play

Vintage kid pile tableau.

Confession 1: Up until three weeks ago, I had never seen as much as 1 minute of the film "It's A Wonderful Life". This is what I knew-- 1940s tall-man Jimmy Stewart plays a dude with a lot of kids who is generally disgrunted with everything and needs the help of an angel named Clarence, who obviously does a good job because in the end our vertically-ample hero is standing in his swarm of offspring, the tiniest of whom chirps the famous lines about bells and wings and Jimmy gargles out "Atta boy, Clarence!" and the thing ends in a charming tableau. That was the extent of my "It's A Wonderful Life" knowledge.

Until three weeks ago, when I got an email from Jack at Blackfriars, asking me if I would accept the role of Mary Bailey in their holiday production of "It's A Wonderful Life: A Live Radio Play". My initial reaction was "oh man I just finished performance of 'Working' at the JCC and Jeff just finished marching band season and it's literally the first week I've had since August when I don't have to be in rehearsals every single night do I really want to commit to another month of rehearsals followed by another month of performances on top of the 8 work-related events that I have to run at Geva this holiday season I feel like I completely missed Autumn 2012 and what if I miss Holidays 2012 because I'm just jumping from show to show gaaaaaahhhhd I just wanna sleep and sit on my couch but I love theatre and opportunities what should I dooooooooo????". That was literally the run-on sentence that played on loop in my head. Fortunately, Jack assured me that the time-commitment would be minimal and said the following magic words: "Jake Purcell is playing George Bailey".

This is Jake Purcell.

Meow. I met Jake last year when he was acting in "The Mystery of Irma Vep" and I was hanging around the theatre to teach a drag queen a rap I had written about Hamlet for the show (I realize how odd that statement sounds, but it is completely true). Our paths crossed again when he was cast as "Joe Kennedy" in Grey Gardens last May, which I worked backstage on. Finally, this was our chance to share the staaaahge! So I said "yes" and jumped onboard the "It's A Wonderful Life" train. The day before the read-through, I made Jeff go to Record Archive with me so I could purchase a VHS copy of the movie, so I wouldn't completely embarrass myself in the first rehearsal when everyone else knew who they were playing and what was going on and I didn't. Due to my crazy schedule, I managed to watch the first half and felt pretty okay about how I was going to do "Mary Bailey"- at least for the first rehearsal!

We started rehearsals with a read-through on November 14th and determined our rehearsal schedule-- I would only be needed at 10 short rehearsals before we opened on December 7th! AND, the rest of the cast is amazing-- Jake "I am very tall" Purcell, Peter Doyle (who I got to work with in Sunday in the Park last summer), Brian Doran (who I met when he was in Grey Gardens), and Linda Gallagher Loy (who I had never met, but who is a hilarious peach of a woman)- so much hysterical laughter which this bunch! AND, because it's supposed to be a live radio play, we would be reading our lines on loose pages in our hands during performances! So no memorization needed! AND, because it's a live radio play with a set consisting of some chairs on either side of two old-fashioned microphones, there would be no blocking to learn! Ummmm.... talk about a BREEZE! Add in that I am one of the two people in the cast who just play one character (poor Brian, Peter and Linda each play around 5-10 characters), and you've got the easiest theatre process I could possibly imagine! Hopefully it stays easy at tonight's rehearsal, the first and final dress rehearsal-- one never knows what can happen when you add gloves, heels and a wig (red, of course) to the mix...


Confession 2: I STILL haven't seen the whole movie.


Also, this is what Jake looks like when he's not smoldering at cameras:

Now you understand my eagerness to act opposite this man.

Mind Your Damn Manners!

For my 28th birthday this past August, Jeff gave me a subscription to Rochester Broadway Theatre League's 2012-2013 season! That's 5 lovely theatre-related date nights over the course of the year! Jeff scored many points with this gift. In October, we enjoyed a national touring production of "Mary Poppins". Jeff had never seen the movie (this is shocking), so it was a fun experience for both of us! So last night, I was very excited to return for the second show of the season, Memphis, which I had seen already on Netflix (yes, there's a recording of the actual Broadway production on Netflix... awesomeness, Netflix!). I walked away from the theatre last night at 10:30pm with extremely strong feelings. Unfortunately, these strong feelings were not about the show, but rather about the blatant lack of theatre etiquette that I witnessed all around me throughout the course of the evening.

I distinctly remember being taught the rules of good theatre etiquette way back when I was in elementary school. We were going to the high school auditorium to see a children's theatre production (I can't remember the specific production, just that the actors all sang a song called "Chicken Noodle Soup with Rice"), and I remember our teachers very deliberately going over the rules of "how to be a good audience members" on the bus.

So I was shocked to see that so many of my fellow patrons had either completely forgotten how to behave or had never been taught in the first place! Allow me to illustrate the no-no's that I witnessed last night:

"leave the Doritos at home, my child"

1) Woman sitting to my left decided that she was hungry 10 minutes into Act I and took the first scene of dialogue as an opportunity to fish through her purse, retrieve a paper bag filled with treats, and sit there crumbling paper and crunch-crunch-crunching on her snack. You are a grown-ass woman at an 8pm show- you don't need an effing snack. Eat dinner before you get to the theatre, not smack in the middle of the first scene.

2) Woman-next-to-me's husband, obviously a musical genius, just CANNOT help himself and must drum his fingers and tap the beat on his playbill (balanced on his thigh) during every single musical number. I understand that you are really feelin' the beat, sir, but there's really no need to prove to the entire row that you are the reincarnation of Gene Krupa. I paid money to hear the pit band play, not you.

3) This dude and his date decided midway through the first act that they needed to move back a row, so they stood up, collected their things and moved. Not 10 minutes later, the guy's legs were thrown over the seats in front of him, his shoes making contact with the upholstery. First of all, if you need to move seats, wait until an appropriate time- intermission. And, you know, no matter how comfortable the atmosphere, I never mistake a theatre with my living room. Theatre seats don't come with ottomans. It's 2.5 hours of your life with a 15-minute stretch break in between-- I think you will survive sitting like an appropriate adult for the duration, sir. And unless you are willing to pay to have 2,500 upholstered theatre seats professionally cleaned, keep your damn boots off of the fabric.

4) Several patrons (including one person that Jeff and I know in real life) kept their hats on for the entirety of the performance. Now, 50 years ago, hats were a staple in men's fashion- they wore them everywhere! EXCEPT indoors. And ESPECIALLY not while attending the theatre. Even growing up in snowy Oswego, a city known for its beastly winters, we were all taught to remove our snow hats once we arrived for a performance. So why is it that, as I sat there in a darkened theatre, I saw numerous men with ski caps, those stupid mini-fedoras, and baseball hats on? Remove your goddamn hat- it's a sign of respect (not to mention the fact that it's an annoying view-blocker for the unfortunate person who is stuck sitting behind you).

Bastards.

5) People who fall asleep. Unfortunately, the person sitting on the other side of me fell prey to this one (but I guess I will forgive him). I see only two scenarios, neither of which have excuses-- 1) you have been up for an obscenely long amount of time and, now that you are sitting still in a dark room, absolutely can't fight the sleepiness, or 2) you are not interested in what's happening on stage. The 3 acceptable solutions to #1 are to take a nap before you leave for the theatre, grab a coffee before the show, or switch your tickets to a night when you'll be well-rested. My solution for #2 is to find something to be interested in- examine the playbill (how many songs are left in the show? what does it say in the lead's bio? etc), really study the design elements of the show (what do you think of the costumes? whose costume do you like best? how are the lights working with the set? how do you think they did that special effect with the scenery? how are the actors using the props?), play "are they hot or not" with each member of the cast onstage, do some people-watching of the patrons sitting in the rows in front of you. I don't care WHAT you do, but find something to occupy yourself. There's always a cure for boredom, and when you are in a theatre at a live performance, sleep is never an appropriate answer. People can see you- the performance and your fellow audience members- and it's very distracting for both (and yes, as a performer, I have been very aware of those audience members who are taking a nap while I'm working my ass off onstage). If you are attending the theatre with someone who starts nodding off, I implore you to poke them in the ribs until they perk the hell up. Then when you get them home, you can send them straight to bed (without any supper!).

6) You know how they tell you to turn off your cell phones before the show even starts? Yeah... that means actually turn them off and forget you have them until the show is over, or until intermission if you can't possibly go off the grid for 2.5 hours uninterrupted (and unless you are an emergency medical professional or your wife is 40 weeks pregnant- in which case what the hell are you doing at the theatre?- you can). They don't tell you to turn them off just to keep you from taking or placing a call- this directive is meant to deter you from using your phone to text, play Words With Friends in the event that you get bored (if you get bored, see #5), or use the glaringly bright display of your iPhone as a flashlight to help you read the program mid-show (as the woman in front of me decided to do during Act II). It's not just the sound of cell phones that is distracting to performers and patrons alike, it's the light that they produce in an otherwise dark venue. Talk about an incredible distraction. Maybe I have superpower eyesight, but I've never needed to whip out my cell phone and wave it around my lap in order to see what song's next-- the stage is pretty well-lit, madam, and you might try simple tilting your program in such a way that the light from the stage illuminates the words on the page. That way, you don't distract your neighbors with the blindingly bright photo of you making duck-lips at yourself in the bathroom mirror at your local Wendy's (nice choice for a display photo, by the way).

7) Sometimes theatre people need to be reminded of the importance of manners. Case in point- we were in the upper balcony, around 10 rows from the light booth. And throughout the entire show, we could hear the technicians and crew talking in full-voice from the booth. And not always about the show. This was particularly evident during the quieter scenes with spoken lines- you know, the ones that are usually really emotional and important to the advancement of the plot. By the end of the performance, I was irritated and decided that it was my duty to alert the House Manager of this distraction from the booth. I politely explained to her where we were sitting (making sure to add that we were subscribers- aka: we'll be coming back and we'll be listening for this problem next time) and the frequency of this issue throughout the evening. She was not at all surprised-- apparently they have had complaints about it all week long from patrons sitting in our section and have had numerous conversations about it with the people in the booth. Now, as a theatre person, I understand the camaraderie that occurs backstage during performances- it's a big part of what makes doing theatre so fun. BUT, when you are in an old (read: not sound-proofed) facility, and all that separates you from your paying audience is a very thin wall with a window, you need to... I don't know... maybe not constantly shoot-the-shit in your outside voice while the show is happening. Especially when said paying customers have been complaining to the management about it after every performance. Manners aren't just expected of people in the audience- they should also be expected of the people involved in the production.

Can't They All Be Naked?

Many of you probably don't know that I'm the Costume Designer for Webster Theatre Guild's upcoming production of "HAIR", opening in the middle of January and running for two weeks. My love affair with "HAIR" began during my junior year of college when I traveled to ACTF (American College Theatre Festival, for those of you who aren't in the know) in Allentown, PA. You see, each year thousands of the finest college-aged theatre nerds are selected to participate in the festival, and some lucky institutions even get to bring entire shows to be presented over the course of the week. This was my second year at ACTF, so I knew everything and was very hot shit, you see. My best friend, Molly (who also happened to be one of the few theatre nerds selected to represent Naz that year), and I decided to take in West Chester University's production of "HAIR" one evening and it ROCKED OUR WORLDS. We had gorgeous hippie-men crawling over the backs of our theatre seats while shoving crotches AND daisies into our faces! There were strobe lights! And a slideshow! And lady-kimonos! And parachutes! And nakedness! And we danced on stage! We got back on the shuttle bus that would take us back to the nerd hotel and we just sat there in complete awe. What had just happened to us? It wasn't until hours later, while dancing our asses off at the mixer in the hotel ballroom, that we realized that not one of those man-hippies was actually as gorgeous and rugged as we thought. Sometimes the magic of theatre is cruel. Especially when the illusion wears off and you're left with a scrawny, 5'5" tall, beak-shnozzed hippie-wannabe grinding on your leg to the music of Ace of Base.


This man kissed muh face!

My second brush with "HAIR" happened years later, but this time it was on the Broadway- the Broad-WAY, people! Whilst visiting friends in NYC over Memorial Day weekend, my friend Katelyn and I decided to TKTS-it for some "HAIR" tickets. Our seats were amaze-balls and we were giddy with excitement as the fog machines filled the colorfully-lit theatre with a rich haze of smoke. I swear to God it smelled like they had fresh marijuana-flavored Glade plug-ins in every outlet of that theatre. It was awesome awesome awesome! Katelyn and I didn't hesitate to run up on that stage- a Broadway stage- to dance with the cast during "Let The Sunshine In" at the end of the show. And the cherry on the theatre-nerd-sundae? THE DUDE WHO PLAYED HUD KISSED ME. ON STAGE. And make no mistake- he was even more beautiful up close. No theatre magic necessary!

So this brings me to my third experience with this, musical theatre's finest tribute to the flower-children. My original concept of blowing my entire costuming budget on daisies and spirit gum was immediately axed (I still think it would have been beautiful and very edgy, thank you very much). In fact, no nudity whatsoever for this production. So that leaves me with having to find actual clothing... circa 1968... for 23 people (many of whom have come on board as replacements for people originally cast who have gone on to greener pastures). Oh what's a costumer to do?

What I want the costumes to look like...



What I worry they'll end up looking like...



My worst nightmare.

This should be interesting...


**UPDATE: Since penning this post, I have received official notification that the show has been cancelled. The world just wasn't ready for you, naked daisy children...

Is That You, Peter?

(if you correctly identified that title as a reference to the 1991 classic film "Hook", I just want to say that you have my love and my respect)

I'm baaaaaack! It's been 6 months since my last post... I got busy, alright?

Let's review:

May: Assistant Stage Managed Grey Gardens at Blackfriars Theatre. Traveled to Italy and toured Rome, Tivoli, Sorrento and Capri. Got a wicked tan. Worked my ass off at Geva.

June: Worked my ass off some more at Geva (including executing our big annual fundraiser with great success). Attended my college roommate's wedding. Bid farewell to my beautiful lady apartment. Discovered Pinterest. Never was productive again.

July: Put everything I own into storage and moved into Jeff's 3rd floor apartment for two weeks. Went creek-walking in Medina. Went to Philly to celebrate my nephew's 1st birthday. Recorded some vocal tracks for an original music RCT is workshopping. Finally moved into our beautiful apartment on Harvard Street and began officially living in sin with beautiful Jeff.

August: Turned 28 and received a purple and yellow bike with a fancy basket (went on a bike ride along the canal and woke up the next morning feeling like I had broken both legs). Began rehearsals for "Working" at the JCC CenterStage.

September: Executed Geva's 40th Anniversary Gala without a hitch. Big changes at Geva. Continued rehearsals at JCC. Performed pieces from that RCT original musical for potential funders around town. Sat in bleachers at field band competitions and had several flashbacks to my years as a "marching buc" back in Oswego (back when they were good- OOH BURN).

October: Performances for "Working"- got two great reviews. Ate a ton of candy. Saw "Mary Poppins" at RBTL. Started giving private lessons again. Began work on "HAIR" for Webster Theatre Guild (hello, costume designer). Went on a haunted hayride.

November: Went to Philly with my family and with Jeff (saw the Rocky steps for the first time). Spent 2 hours in a freezing storage facility, pulling costumes for "HAIR". Joined the cast for "It's a Wonderful Life: A Live Radio Play" at Blackfriars as "Mary Bailey". Celebrated Thanksgiving in Oswego with the entire family. Decorated the apartment for Christmas.

Well, I guess that's it. Up to speed now. HOPEFULLY will be much better about posting entries on this thing from now on!

She got it from her Mama!

I'm mouthy. I'm sassy. I'm "vocal" (which is probably the most *professional* way to say it). Whatever you want to call it, I just can't stop myself from speaking my mind.

Perhaps is because I was raised in a household under a strong woman. My mom, who is a native Texan, was once publicly nicknamed "The Mouth from the South", a label that I have always proudly thought of as a fabulous compliment. Now that I'm an adult, I am becoming increasingly aware of how much influence my assertive mother has had on the woman I've become.

I have learned that it's important to stand up for yourself. You need to be your own champion. In the end, I believe that people will respect you more for speaking your mind and advocating for what you believe to be right and true. Sure, not everyone is going to agree with you and you probably will step on some toes along the way, but at least you'll be sure of your integrity as an honest, free-thinking individual. You have opinions, thoughts and feelings-- they are worth hearing. You have a voice-- you are supposed to use it.

As I am growing older, I'm learning how to use that voice more effectively. The hot-headedness of my youth is still there, no doubt, but I'm figuring out how to temper it with patience, professionalism, and intelligent (as opposed to impulsive) argument. I'm nowhere near perfect, but I'm getting much better at asserting myself in a more judicious and savvy manner. And I think the ability to speak your mind in an intelligent and firm way makes your argument, whatever it is, even more compelling.

So when I see behavior or practices that I find unprofessional, inappropriate or unfair (at work), or unkind, hypocritical or hurtful (in life), I don't hesitate to speak up. You can call me a whistleblower or a bitch, you can accuse me of being sassy or bold or overconfident. I really don't care. I will take all of those labels as a fabulous compliment because I know that I am using the voice that I have a right to express, the voice that I am intelligent and confident enough to share, the voice that my mother taught me to use. Not for anyone else, but for myself. I think THIS is what it means to be a real woman.

So Happy Mother's Day to my mom, "The Mouth from the South" herself, who didn't just teach her daughters the importance of using their brains, but also the significance of being a little mouthy! Thanks mom!

Spaces that inspire me...

Anyone who has seen my apartment knows that I like to spend a lot of my "disposable" (okay, so sometimes I dip into funds beyond the "disposable") money on decorating my living space. I can't help it-- I love coming home to a space that is 1) my own, and 2) beautiful. I take great pride in the fact that my home doesn't look at like the haphazard apartment of a 20-something-- everything goes and looks finished and intentional. Yes, I want my home to look like it came out of a freakin' magazine.

For over a year now, I've been collecting images of rooms that inspire me. I could spend hours and hours perusing google image search results for "beautiful bedrooms" and "neutral living rooms". I've got an entire folder on my macbook dedicated to "Inspirational Images"- it's like my own personal Pinterest (which I started before there was Pinterest, thank you very much). These images have acted as my guide to decorating my space and as the inspiration for many of my DIY projects over the last year...

The image that inspired my DIY headboard

The living room that inspired the colors and overall look of my apartment
(this was the image that made me determined to get my own lady apartment in the first place!)

The image that convinced me that it was okay to paint
my old wooden dresser a charming shade of aqua.

Everything about this screams "MY BEDROOM"-
 the headboard, the "anal-bead" lamp, the light rug,
the starburst mirror above the headboard, the smokey grey walls...

Inspiration for my DIY sink skirt with box pleats
(perfect for hiding Bebe's kitty litter!)

Inspiration for the framed "doodle art" in my dining room (thanks mom!)

The perfect dark grey for my bedroom- Behr's "Creek Bend"

Happiness is...

I am, admittedly, a bit of a grumbler- sometimes it feels like all I do is complain, especially about work, sometimes about being tired, and every now and then about some aspect of the creative projects I'm working on (gasp!). Due to some "personalities" at work, the last few months have seen an upswing in the frequency and intensity of my frustration and subsequent whining.

That being said, I can't help but notice that I feel happier lately... much happier! I attribute this to a few things...

1) Sunshine. God, things seem so much easier when the sun is shining brightly, the sky is blue, and there's a warm breeze. I don't know WHAT is going on with the Rochester weather this winter, but I think Spring has officially sprung-- we've been basking in the daily glow of 60-70 degree temperatures and sunny days for a couple of weeks now. If this is global warming, I'm okay with it. Everything just seems to much more carefree when the weather is beautiful like that-- makes me just want to fling open my windows to let the breeze gently blow my gauzy curtains as I laze around a freshly cleaned apartment. It makes walking to and from my car a pleasure every day. Things that might normally irritate me are met with a "who cares- it's perfect outside today" attitude. I strangely feel so much more productive, and that makes me happy. 

2) Forcing myself to start my day earlier. I know... anyone who has ever had to deal with me first thing in the morning knows that I am the poster child for the "not a morning person" movement. My parents have a home video of me when I was 3, sitting at the breakfast table eating Lucky Charms in my pjs, and after having tried to ignore my mom's attempts to engage me in conversation, I glared straight into the camera and grumpily uttered the words "don't.bug.me." and went back to eating my marshmallows. True story- I have the proof on video. Despite this aversion to all things early, I've been forcing myself to "get up" when I "wake up", which means the difference between resignedly rolling out of bed at 8:30am (I'm supposed to be at work at 9am) and starting my day at 7ish. That's a big difference! Think what I could do with that extra time-- I can eat breakfast if I want to, I actually have time to make myself look polished and put-together (and when you look great, you feel great), I can watch an episode of Keeping up with the Kardashians, I can tidy my apartment... so many possibilities! Now I get to work right on time, if not early, I don't come home to a disaster every day, and I get to spend the day looking nice and not thrown together. I've noticed that I actually feel less tired throughout the days when I don't allow myself to go back to sleep until the last possible moment. All those things make me feel good!

3) Butterflies. You know the ones, right? The ones that are caused by seeing or talking to or thinking about someone you reeeeeally like? Yep- I've got those... ! 2011 was a very tough year for love for this adorkable gal- lots of baggage to wade through, lots of soul-searching, lots of dating attempts, lots of worrying that my previous experiences had left me permanently broken in the relationship department, lots of lonely cat-lady behavior (I may or may not have taped a music video set to Celine Dion's "All By Myself" over the course of many solitary nights last Fall... the music video features an obscenely large bag of cotton candy, an entire spectrum of sweatpants, my couch, my cat, wine... need I continue?). But 2012 is a new year, and a little romance finally found me when I was least expecting it! It feels good to be a genuinely smitten kitten again and I'm so relieved to find that all the nervousness that I've been holding onto when it comes to getting back into the game has been replaced with excitement and straight-up happiness. I feel like a school girl again! Hah!

4) Babies. I love babies. In fact, I love them so much that I would embark upon a 6-hour solo road trip after working a full day and going to a dentist appointment just to see one. Well, I wouldn't do that for just ANY baby, you're right. But I would TOTALLY do it for MY baybee, my nephew Ben! And that's just what I'll be doing tonight- picking up and driving to Philly all by myself right after my dentist appointment this afternoon. Yes, I will be driving with a half-numb face for the better part of the first hour (let's just hope that my coffee doesn't dribble down my chin while I'm driving) and I won't be arriving at my destination until 11pm because of my late start, but it's totally worth it. I haven't seen Ben since Christmas (iChats don't count) and the pictures my sister posts are only getting more and more adorable. The last time we Skyped, we had a good time making fart noises (okay, I was the one making the fart noises, but he was enjoying them) and shaking our heads "no" vigorously (his newest trick). I can't wait to play with him in person! He's the cutest thing ever and I've made sure to charge up my camera because this aunt is gonna be takin' a lot of photos and videos this weekend! Can't wait!

       So there are my 4 current big-time "happy"-makers. Honorable mentions go out to iced cappuccinos, my upcoming European vacation in less than 2 months (more on that in a subsequent post!), fresh flower arrangements, $5 dvds, good hair days, naps, my new piping gun for decorating baked goods, compliments, free movie passes, free time, online shopping, and goat cheese.   :-)

Treat Yo'self!

If there's one thing I've learned over the last year or so, it's that sometimes you've just gotta treat yo'self!  Treats come in many different forms-- enjoying a favorite meal, taking an obscenely long shower, blowing a paycheck on a new wardrobe, spending 4 uninterrupted hours playing Donkey Kong, snuggling up with a pile of dvds and a handful of Oreos... basically anything that you do for yourself that recharges your batteries and leaves you feeling fabulously content. 

After a rather stressful week (opening a show, having my wallet stolen, signing over the deed to my old house, dealing with conflicts at work, cranking out a huge grant, having to walk home from Geva after sitting in a line of cars in the parking garage for 45 minutes, only to have my car run out of gas while I was driving on 490E- yes, I was literally on my way to the gas station), I decided that today needed to be a "Treat Yo'self" day!

Here's my luxurious "Treat Yo'self" Day in a nutshell:

- The day would have begun much later, had I been allowed to actually sleep-in. Bebe had other ideas, however. I woke up at 8am to the sounds of Bea knocking each of my books, one-by-one off of the bookshelf next to my bed. One-by-one. Meticulously. Until they were all on the floor in a giant pile. Since I wasn't going to fall back asleep any time soon, I whipped out Mockingjay, the final book in The Hunger Games series and snuggled under my covers. There's something amazing about curling up in bed with an engrossing book, no pressure to start your day.

- A haircut and blow-out, courtesy of Stephanie at Shear Ego Salon. Stephanie is awesome, not just because she knows exactly how to make my hair look effortlessly bouncy, shiny and frizz-free, but because she's just friggin' cool. I've never been one to enjoy participating in small-talk with hairdressers, but Stephanie remembers everything about what's going on in my life and actually listens and contributes to the conversation. It's like going in and dishing to a fabulous unbiased friend for 30 minutes and coming out looking (and feeling) like a rockstar. Love her. I also like going in looking like a raggamuffin and having all the snotty stylists ignore me and then emerging from Stephanie's chairs to "ohmygosh"es and "wow- your hair is beautiful, what an amazing color" etc. That's right!

- A luxury pedicure at the tiny Korean nail salon in Brighton. The walls may be painted a sickening shade of peach and the posters are most definitely from the 1980s, but these gals know their stuff. I brought my book with me, as I was getting dangerously close to the climax and NEEDED to know what was going to happen next. I sat in my leather massage armchair while the lady set to work. The luxury pedicure there is amazing-- in addition to all the normal pedicure things, they do a lavender scrub on your feet and legs, then cover your feet with a green minty mud mask and wrap them in hot towels and stick them in baggies. Your feet instantly start tingling (and that doesn't stop for a good 3 hours after the pedicure). While the mask does its work, they massage your legs with lavender-scented lotions and oils. Then they liberate your feet from the baggies and massage them... amazing. It was the loveliest thing ever to just sit there (with perfect hair thanks to Stephanie), reading my book, while my tired legs/feet got the full service. 35 minutes of bliss, I tell you.

- I paid a delivery man to bring me Pizza Hut at my house. <drool>

- Curling up on the couch in an oversized sweater and sweatpants with my little space heater pointed on my toes and the window-blinds open so the glorious afternoon sunshine could stream through. Bebe curled up on my chest and together we finished my book (perhaps she felt bad about killing all my other books this morning), followed by a leisurely trip through the cable channels, until we landed on A League of their Own, one of my favorite movies.

And that's where I am right now, friends. Every now and then we all need to take a day (or even a morning or just an afternoon) to treat ourselves to the special little things that provide us with relief and rejuvenation. <Sigh> Too bad I can't get away with doing this EVERY Saturday!

Git yo' Headshots did!

Hello dear readers!
     Those of you devoted to this blog (hi mom!) will remember that I posted a few weeks ago with some "life renovation" plans for the new year-- 1) Get my artistic shit together, and 2) re-paint my bedroom. Well, I'm very proud to announce that great advancements have been made over the last month in both of these areas! I did, in fact, re-paint my bedroom just a few weeks ago and it is now a lovely shade of dark grey (specifically, Behr's "Creek Bend")... before and after pictures to be revealed in a subsequent blog post- stay tuned. AND, last Friday I had professional headshots taken with Tammy Swales, who is probably the BEST photographer in Rochester.

      I have never had headshots taken before. The shot I've been using pretty much my entire adult life was a black & white snapshot that I took of myself in the hallway outside of my bedroom at 1am. Definitely not professional, but passable. I've been lusting after real headshots these last couple of years, silently admiring and envying the colorful, glossy prints of my colleagues (which, hung next to my lazy shot, made mine look even more amateurish). I really wanted a colorful, glossy professional shot of my own and I wanted to unveil it at the opening of The Little Dog Laughed on March 3rd. The time had come. I took my rewards check from my health insurance company (thanks, MVP!) and scheduled an appointment with Ms. Swales.

     Of course, my thoughts immediately turned to "ohmygahdwhatshouldiwear?" and "jesuschristihopemyfacedoesn'tbreakoutthedaybeforetheshoot" and "shouldiwhitenmyteeth?" and "ooohishouldhavestuckwiththatpersonaltrainer"... and "doipartmyhairinthecenteranddobluntbangsorpartitonthesideanddoasoftswoopbang?"... so many decisions. I'm not qualified to make all of these decisions. So I enlisted the help of professionals where I could, booking a hair appointment for the morning of the shoot (because I should not be left to my own devices) and persuading my friend Robyn Fazio to do my makeup (cause Robyn is a professional, yo'). Now all I really had to worry about was clothes. Being the redhead that I am, I packed a suitcase full of greens, blues, purples and a token coral shirt just in case. Also, a pair of bright blue peep-toe pumps... because shoes are important... when you're shooting a headshot... ?

     I awoke that morning, dragged my lazy ass to my car with my suitcase in tow, and made my way to the hair salon. My usual hairwizard, Stephanie, wasn't there that morning. Neither was my go-to back-up hairmaster, Valentina (who is Bosnian and beautiful, but only ever nods and says "yes. good." in a soft and deep accent). So I had Joyce. Ohhhhhh Joyce. Never again, Joyce. It's not that you were bad, you just... you just didn't get me, Joyce. Or my bangs.

     Then I sped off to Tammy's studio, where I was to meet Robyn for "face-fixing". This was the best-- I got to sit in a comfy chair and drink coffee through a straw while Robyn tickled my face with her brushes and gossiped with me. I could do that forever! We got all caught up and laughed a lot, and she did things to my face that I didn't even think were necessary to beauty but so definitely are I now realize. Then Tammy pulled up a chair and gabbed with us for a while. I performed my Hamlet rap for them while Robyn spray-painted my face. I confided in them my doubts about Joyce and her ability with my bangs. They assured me I was fine.

    Until we started shooting... THEN they started cursing Joyce. "Damn you, Joyce!" was bellowed more than once as Robyn repeatedly popped into the shot to adjust my wayward fringe between camera clicks. We shot for two hours, accompanied by an underscore of disco classics and JLo jams. Tammy was awesome and Robyn was an all-star, wielding a blowdryer at the perfect angle for a little Beyonce hair-fanning action where necessary, hiding unruly bra straps, and employing the use of clamps on the back of my shirt to "tighten that shit"! We finished the shoot with a series outside of Tammy's building. As I posed on the sidewalk, a Waste Management truck drove up and parked right behind me. The drivers winked and pointed. I hope Tammy managed to get that truck in the shot... it would be very "me", I suppose. Homeless Steve walked by, but we did not invite him to join the shoot. Poor Steve. He just wants to be a part of the art.

    So now I have to wait till Monday to go through all the shots and pick which ones I want. In the meantime, Tammy sent me this teaser....

      Sha-ZAM! Can't wait to see what the rest look like! I'll report back once I get the final digital files of the ones I pick! In the meantime, I encourage everyone to check out http://www.tammyswales.com/ to see more of Tammy's work (and I recommend any Rochester actors work with her for headshots... she's awesome!) and http://www.robynfazio.com/ to see Robyn's makeup artistry (DO IT!). AWESOME!

   

Mary's Musical Meowmers!

I love lolcats. I love sondheimcats. If you don't have any idea what the hell I'm talking about, google them and thank me four hours later when you're done compulsively clicking "next" to reveal a brand new page of adorable silliness. I love them so much, in fact, that they've inspired me to create my own version, giving me an excuse to scour the interwebs for cute kitteh pictures and pair them with captions from appropriate songs in the music theatre canon. I give you... "Mary's Musical Meowmers"...

Happy Gevaversary!

Today marks 1 year working at Geva! I made it! Weeeeeee!

I still remember my first day, 'twas a typical blustery Rochester winter's day and I wore my "artsy" black dress with the sheer blue and green print overlay with blouson sleeves, paired with black tights and patent leather t-strap pumps. I meant business. (fast-forward one year to the day and I'm sitting at my desk wearing black leggings, a red tunic, an oversized fuzzy sweater, and my shit-kicker boots... oh how our standards for ourselves fade with time...)

Milestones of this nature prompt me to pause and reflect on my experiences over the last year. Here's a brief review- since February 7th of 2011, I have:

•  gotten my own apartment, which I've been able to decorate gorgeously (hooray!)
•  been cast in my first film project (yay!)
•  finally got health insurance again (yay!)
•  had my heart broken into a million tiny pieces (alright, not so 'yay!'), which ultimately taught me a lot about myself (okay, maybe that part's a 'yay')
•  played Dot/Marie and Sunday in the Park with George and restored my faith in myself as an artist(DOUBLE yay!)
•  started getting pretty regular manicures, pedicures and massages ("if you can't love yo'self, how the hell you gonna love somebody else? can I git an amen?!")
•  became an Aunt- shout-out to my baybee, Ben (who will be 7 months old tomorrow)!
•  finally got my own pet, the freedom cat I've been threatening to get for years, sweet little Bebe!
•  ran a 5k
•  tried Match.com
•  decided Match.com sucked and gave up on boys completely
•  decided that maybe boys aren't so bad and started dating again here and there
•  ultimately decided not to focus on having or being in a relationship anymore (which was the best decision of all)
•  got cast in my first straight-play in over 6 years and dove back into all the things I've missed about plays that make the experience so different from working on musicals.
•  started a blog!
•  got a gym membership and actually paid someone to kick my ass while I was there.
•  traveled to NYC to ring in the new year and reconnect with old friends
•  expanded my creative gigs to include readings at Geva
•  broke a toof, which acted as the catalyst to a long string of dental appointments. I feel confident in saying that my relationship with my dentist has been my longest, most serious and committed relationship of 2011. 

      It's been a busy year filled with MAJOR transitions, and even though there have been a few serious potholes here and there, I'd say that I came out pretty okay in the end! It's hard to believe how much has changed in the time since I got this Geva job and found out I would be returning to Rochester. But I guess that's what growing up is all about! Makes you wonder what will come between now and my TWO-year Gevaversary! (and God, please let there be a two-year Gevaversary... I know I'm sassy during meetings and that I sometimes don't check my voicemail until after lunch, but I just re-signed my lease and this whole paycheck thing has really been working out for me!)

"The play is the thing, Amy!"

Where muh literary nerds at?? 10 points to those that recognize and appreciate the movie quote above... it's one of my favs. Another hint? "Yer potatoooooooes!"

Pressing forward...

I've recently started rehearsals for The Little Dog Laughed, opening at Blackfriars Theatre on March 3rd! Not to jinx it, but IT'S GONNA BE FREAKIN' AWESOME <knocks on wood>. No joke, dude. I play Ellen, a "NYC party-girl" who is superficial, naive and quite sassy and also happens to be in a relationship with a gay dude... story of my life. Bring on the comic aggression and crazy hand gestures! I've got 3 kickass monologues, some great one-liners and zingers, and Jack's gonna hook me up with some kickass posh costumes. This play's got everything: boy-on-girl kissing, boy-on-boy kissing, swears, snarkiness, drunkiness, sugar daddies, and naked boy-butt. (am I channeling Stefon from SNL's Weekend Update? "this club's got everything: lights, psychos, furbies, screaming babies in Mozart wigs, Teddy Graham people, human fire hydrants- you know, its that thing where high-waisted midgets have the red pants and the big ass?").

I've gotta say, it feels really good to be working on not just a show, but a PLAY. It's been over 6 years since I've done a non-musical for adults (I don't count any of the children's theatre "plays" I've done in that time... perky princesses and congested little bunny rabbits don't quite resonate the same way). Considering I went to school for acting (not for singing and definitely not for dancing), I'm beyond pumped to dig into the script and play with this character. And I've never worked with any of my fellow actors before, so that makes it doubly exciting! Something about working on a show... it instantly reinvigorates and inspires me-- I truly don't feel *myself* unless I'm working on a production! It always feels amazing!

So mark your calendars now-- The Little Dog Laughed, opening at Blackfriars Theatre March 3rd and running through March 17th!

Life Renovations

... aaaaand two months later, I thought it was about time for me to write another entry! I told you I suck at keeping on top of this kind of stuff.

Quick recap of that last 2 months: basically lived at work what with all the special events happening at the theatre lately, karaoked to "Part of Your World" from The Little Mermaid at the Geva staff holiday part and convinced my boss's 3-year-old daughter that I was Ariel, saw some shows, went home for Christmas and spent all 4 days acting like a complete idiot just to make my 6-month old nephew to laugh, began working out with a personal trainer, discovered the luxury of a steam room, went to NYC and rang in 2012 with half a Carvel ice cream cake smashed into my hair, got a new entertainment center, went on a few dates, auditioned for some shows and got an awesome role in The Little Dog Laughed at Blackfriars (coming this March), and began planning a trip to Italy for May 2012. Oh yeah, and had like 6 dentist appointments over the course of those 8 weeks (see "Oh Cheeseburgers, Why Have You Forsaken Me?" post from November for the inciting incident of this ongoing tooth saga). My dentist and I are tight now- we text each other. Seriously.

So for my first post of 2012, I will fill you in on two of my "life renovation" plans that I hope to tackle over the next few months.

1) Paint the bedroom. My bedroom is currently the same light dove grey that is featured throughout the rest of my apartment. Paired with the icy blue dresser I refinished last summer, the white headboard I upholstered last Spring, white curtains and nightstands (upon which sit white lamps) and the white/icy blue/pale grey bedding, I've determined that my room is just a little too bland for my taste. So I've decided to repaint the walls a darker shade of grey to make all those lighter items really POP. After much internet research on the subject of "dark grey bedrooms", I think I've finally chosen my new shade: Behr's "Creek Bend", a darker warm grey. Valspar's "Porcelain Shale" came in at a close second. By the way, who makes up these names for paint? I want THAT job. Where the hell do they come up with this stuff? My first color would be a golden brown that I would name "Apologetic Twinkie". Other colors in the collection might include "Exhuberant Fjord" (an icy blue), "Apoplectic Rocket" (a bright red), and "Rhetorical Reef" (a charming shade of deep coral).

2) Step-up my game as a performer. I've been auditioning for stuff for well over 10 years now... it's time I really got my shit together. Don't get me wrong, I've been pretty successful and have a nice track record (I shall take a moment to brag- this week, for the first time EVER, I didn't get into a show that I auditioned for... in 10 years. That's pretty good.), but I fully acknowledge that there are things that I have been either ignoring, avoiding or just plain finding shortcuts around. For instance, I have never gotten a professional headshot taken. The shot I've been using for the last 2 years was a photo I took of myself on my Canon SD 1100 in the hallway of my old apartment at 1am. It's decent and it's gotten me by, but it's time to invest in the real thing, baby. In addition, I've decided that I need to compile a "book" for auditions. Back in the day when I was at school, there was no talk of preparing a book of pieces for auditions- that didn't get added to the curriculum until after I had graduated and the Music Theatre program at Naz really took off. It would have been very helpful information to have had at that time, when I was constantly searching for music and monologues and had countless resources at my disposal. Well, better late than never I guess! So I'm going to start actively seeking audition-appropriate pieces that appeal to my strengths so I am TOTALLY prepared with an arsenal of "talent weapons" at auditions from here on out!

So those are two of my many "life renovations" for 2012... anyone have any fun ideas to consider? I'm taking suggestions!