Happiness is...

I am, admittedly, a bit of a grumbler- sometimes it feels like all I do is complain, especially about work, sometimes about being tired, and every now and then about some aspect of the creative projects I'm working on (gasp!). Due to some "personalities" at work, the last few months have seen an upswing in the frequency and intensity of my frustration and subsequent whining.

That being said, I can't help but notice that I feel happier lately... much happier! I attribute this to a few things...

1) Sunshine. God, things seem so much easier when the sun is shining brightly, the sky is blue, and there's a warm breeze. I don't know WHAT is going on with the Rochester weather this winter, but I think Spring has officially sprung-- we've been basking in the daily glow of 60-70 degree temperatures and sunny days for a couple of weeks now. If this is global warming, I'm okay with it. Everything just seems to much more carefree when the weather is beautiful like that-- makes me just want to fling open my windows to let the breeze gently blow my gauzy curtains as I laze around a freshly cleaned apartment. It makes walking to and from my car a pleasure every day. Things that might normally irritate me are met with a "who cares- it's perfect outside today" attitude. I strangely feel so much more productive, and that makes me happy. 

2) Forcing myself to start my day earlier. I know... anyone who has ever had to deal with me first thing in the morning knows that I am the poster child for the "not a morning person" movement. My parents have a home video of me when I was 3, sitting at the breakfast table eating Lucky Charms in my pjs, and after having tried to ignore my mom's attempts to engage me in conversation, I glared straight into the camera and grumpily uttered the words "don't.bug.me." and went back to eating my marshmallows. True story- I have the proof on video. Despite this aversion to all things early, I've been forcing myself to "get up" when I "wake up", which means the difference between resignedly rolling out of bed at 8:30am (I'm supposed to be at work at 9am) and starting my day at 7ish. That's a big difference! Think what I could do with that extra time-- I can eat breakfast if I want to, I actually have time to make myself look polished and put-together (and when you look great, you feel great), I can watch an episode of Keeping up with the Kardashians, I can tidy my apartment... so many possibilities! Now I get to work right on time, if not early, I don't come home to a disaster every day, and I get to spend the day looking nice and not thrown together. I've noticed that I actually feel less tired throughout the days when I don't allow myself to go back to sleep until the last possible moment. All those things make me feel good!

3) Butterflies. You know the ones, right? The ones that are caused by seeing or talking to or thinking about someone you reeeeeally like? Yep- I've got those... ! 2011 was a very tough year for love for this adorkable gal- lots of baggage to wade through, lots of soul-searching, lots of dating attempts, lots of worrying that my previous experiences had left me permanently broken in the relationship department, lots of lonely cat-lady behavior (I may or may not have taped a music video set to Celine Dion's "All By Myself" over the course of many solitary nights last Fall... the music video features an obscenely large bag of cotton candy, an entire spectrum of sweatpants, my couch, my cat, wine... need I continue?). But 2012 is a new year, and a little romance finally found me when I was least expecting it! It feels good to be a genuinely smitten kitten again and I'm so relieved to find that all the nervousness that I've been holding onto when it comes to getting back into the game has been replaced with excitement and straight-up happiness. I feel like a school girl again! Hah!

4) Babies. I love babies. In fact, I love them so much that I would embark upon a 6-hour solo road trip after working a full day and going to a dentist appointment just to see one. Well, I wouldn't do that for just ANY baby, you're right. But I would TOTALLY do it for MY baybee, my nephew Ben! And that's just what I'll be doing tonight- picking up and driving to Philly all by myself right after my dentist appointment this afternoon. Yes, I will be driving with a half-numb face for the better part of the first hour (let's just hope that my coffee doesn't dribble down my chin while I'm driving) and I won't be arriving at my destination until 11pm because of my late start, but it's totally worth it. I haven't seen Ben since Christmas (iChats don't count) and the pictures my sister posts are only getting more and more adorable. The last time we Skyped, we had a good time making fart noises (okay, I was the one making the fart noises, but he was enjoying them) and shaking our heads "no" vigorously (his newest trick). I can't wait to play with him in person! He's the cutest thing ever and I've made sure to charge up my camera because this aunt is gonna be takin' a lot of photos and videos this weekend! Can't wait!

       So there are my 4 current big-time "happy"-makers. Honorable mentions go out to iced cappuccinos, my upcoming European vacation in less than 2 months (more on that in a subsequent post!), fresh flower arrangements, $5 dvds, good hair days, naps, my new piping gun for decorating baked goods, compliments, free movie passes, free time, online shopping, and goat cheese.   :-)

Treat Yo'self!

If there's one thing I've learned over the last year or so, it's that sometimes you've just gotta treat yo'self!  Treats come in many different forms-- enjoying a favorite meal, taking an obscenely long shower, blowing a paycheck on a new wardrobe, spending 4 uninterrupted hours playing Donkey Kong, snuggling up with a pile of dvds and a handful of Oreos... basically anything that you do for yourself that recharges your batteries and leaves you feeling fabulously content. 

After a rather stressful week (opening a show, having my wallet stolen, signing over the deed to my old house, dealing with conflicts at work, cranking out a huge grant, having to walk home from Geva after sitting in a line of cars in the parking garage for 45 minutes, only to have my car run out of gas while I was driving on 490E- yes, I was literally on my way to the gas station), I decided that today needed to be a "Treat Yo'self" day!

Here's my luxurious "Treat Yo'self" Day in a nutshell:

- The day would have begun much later, had I been allowed to actually sleep-in. Bebe had other ideas, however. I woke up at 8am to the sounds of Bea knocking each of my books, one-by-one off of the bookshelf next to my bed. One-by-one. Meticulously. Until they were all on the floor in a giant pile. Since I wasn't going to fall back asleep any time soon, I whipped out Mockingjay, the final book in The Hunger Games series and snuggled under my covers. There's something amazing about curling up in bed with an engrossing book, no pressure to start your day.

- A haircut and blow-out, courtesy of Stephanie at Shear Ego Salon. Stephanie is awesome, not just because she knows exactly how to make my hair look effortlessly bouncy, shiny and frizz-free, but because she's just friggin' cool. I've never been one to enjoy participating in small-talk with hairdressers, but Stephanie remembers everything about what's going on in my life and actually listens and contributes to the conversation. It's like going in and dishing to a fabulous unbiased friend for 30 minutes and coming out looking (and feeling) like a rockstar. Love her. I also like going in looking like a raggamuffin and having all the snotty stylists ignore me and then emerging from Stephanie's chairs to "ohmygosh"es and "wow- your hair is beautiful, what an amazing color" etc. That's right!

- A luxury pedicure at the tiny Korean nail salon in Brighton. The walls may be painted a sickening shade of peach and the posters are most definitely from the 1980s, but these gals know their stuff. I brought my book with me, as I was getting dangerously close to the climax and NEEDED to know what was going to happen next. I sat in my leather massage armchair while the lady set to work. The luxury pedicure there is amazing-- in addition to all the normal pedicure things, they do a lavender scrub on your feet and legs, then cover your feet with a green minty mud mask and wrap them in hot towels and stick them in baggies. Your feet instantly start tingling (and that doesn't stop for a good 3 hours after the pedicure). While the mask does its work, they massage your legs with lavender-scented lotions and oils. Then they liberate your feet from the baggies and massage them... amazing. It was the loveliest thing ever to just sit there (with perfect hair thanks to Stephanie), reading my book, while my tired legs/feet got the full service. 35 minutes of bliss, I tell you.

- I paid a delivery man to bring me Pizza Hut at my house. <drool>

- Curling up on the couch in an oversized sweater and sweatpants with my little space heater pointed on my toes and the window-blinds open so the glorious afternoon sunshine could stream through. Bebe curled up on my chest and together we finished my book (perhaps she felt bad about killing all my other books this morning), followed by a leisurely trip through the cable channels, until we landed on A League of their Own, one of my favorite movies.

And that's where I am right now, friends. Every now and then we all need to take a day (or even a morning or just an afternoon) to treat ourselves to the special little things that provide us with relief and rejuvenation. <Sigh> Too bad I can't get away with doing this EVERY Saturday!