Fred Savage, Christmas Trees, and Caves: Oh My!

It's been a few days since I've posted, as my mother reminded me over the phone this afternoon. I can pretty much sum up the last three days of my life in three subjects: Fred Savage, Christmas Trees, and Caves. I realize that those three things really sound odd and super random when clumped together like that, but it was just that kind of weekend! Allow me to explain...

The savage Savage

Friday: After working a long hard day at the theatre (which included pitching a restaurant partnership to a young, greased Mediterranean man in a track jacket... I'm not convinced he had a shirt on underneath it), my good friend Becky and I drove over to our good friend Jason's house for an evening of cheesy pizza and cheesy movies. Jason is a big fan of really ridiculous horror movies, especially the ones where objects become self-aware and start murdering people (check out the movie "Rubber" on Netflix... it's about a rubber tire named "Robert" that uses its psychic powers to blow up birds, bunnies and eventually people... ). Becky and I were excited to see what Jason had selected for the evening's entertainment. We were not disappointed-- I submit to you "No One Would Tell", a Lifetime movie about young love turning dangerous, starring none other than Fred Savage and Candace Cameron... that's right-- Kevin Arnold and DJ Tanner! They are in love, you see, but he has some severe jealousy issues (can you blame him after all that back and forth with Winnie Cooper?). SPOILER ALERT: Kevin Arnold murders DJ Tanner! This movie was filmed in 1996 (but released on dvd in 2006) and features the very best scrunchies, mom jeans, Full House side-boob, and unicorn jewelry I've seen in cinema in a long time. Needless to say, we had a good time.

Fancy tree!

Saturday: Bethany and I decided to spend our Saturday being fancy retail ladies. We put on our comfiest shopping clothes (later noting that we really looked like a lesbian couple) and headed to Webster, where the crafter's Mecca awaited. Hobby Lobby. God bless it! After doing 7 laps through the Christmas section (which was massive and had me repeating "I want all the things" over and over again), we got down to business with a cart. After about an hour, we had damn near filled the entire thing with various holiday items and a few crafty treats. Not to mention the GIANT ARTIFICIAL CHRISTMAS TREE for my Lady Apartment! That's right-- I have a beautiful 7.5 fancy Christmas tree! It's perfect and will look lovely nestled in my living room, festooned with frosty silver and champagne ornaments and decor. It's taking everything in me to wait until after Thanksgiving to put it up (I am morally opposed to celebrating Thanksgiving amongst Christmas decor). Anyway, back to Saturday-- we rambled over to Target, where we spent 30 minutes comparing and contrasting holiday wrapping paper combinations. We celebrated Bethany's fine trio of mod-printed papers with lunch at Uno, followed by one more trip to Hobby Lobby, where the cashiers made fun of us (right in front of us) for coming back. Whatevs, Christian cashiers, we needed our tacky glue and ribbon. PS- I am now equipped to fully bedazzle my Super Nintendo system.

Effin' cave

Sunday: I spent the majority of my day in a cave. YEP. A STRAIGHT UP CAVE, Y'ALL. Which I will use as my excuse as to why this post is not as cleverly witty as my last couple-- I blame it on the effect of cave air on my brain. For those of you who don't already know, I've been working on shooting "Indiana Jones and the Legend of Bimini", an Indiana Jones fan film through Tatem Productions. We started shooting in back in July and still have a few more scenes to get in the can before they can start editing and making it look like a fancy movie. I'm hoping we'll wrap by the end of the year (since my costume consists of a very thin silk short-sleeved blouse and very thin TIGHT capri pants- not conducive to outdoor shoots as the weather gets colder... and colder), though I have a feeling we'll extend into January. I've been joking that we need to add a "boob warmer" position to the crew. Okay, maybe I wasn't joking. Anyways, we spent the day shooting in Lockport Caves today, which was very cold, very dark, and very creepy. I spent the entire time on the lookout for giant cave spiders and pale bat-boys. I felt like an Inferi was going to pop out of the water at any minute, or that those creatures from "The Descent" were going to crawl out of the ceiling and eat us. This scene is the climax of the film and ends with my character, Carolyn, losing her shit and bursting into tears. Well, after standing in a cave, with the nearest ladies' room a mile down the road, freezing my ass off and having cave-ceiling water dripping on me for 5 hours, that shot was a drop in the bag for me. We were running behind schedule and the guy who runs the cave was pressuring us to wrap it up and we hadn't shot my meltdown yet. We had about 2 minutes to get the shot and get out of the damn cave. I did that shit in one take. And let me tell you... those were real tears at that point! I let it all out, right into my buddy Rick's furry chest hair (Rick plays Indy). Hahaha, that poor dude just held me as I sobbed ugly sobs into his open shirt and it felt like the camera was on us FOREVER. But I just kept crying, dude-- I was tired, freezing and I had to pee. It was not hard. As soon as I heard "CUT", I was outta there, man! It wasn't until I got all the way back up to my car when I realized that I still had my microphone pack on...


So that was my weekend: Fred Savage, Christmas trees, and caves. You know, the usual!