Officially Taking a Break

I've been saying that I'm going to temporarily retire from the theatre for a while now. For months I said "Oh, after Shrek, I'm done for a while", with the intention that I would go out on top like George Costanza- <triumphantly raises arms in the air> "Alright, that's it for me!". Everyone asked me if I was auditioning for Young Frankenstein at the JCC and I adamantly said "nope- I'm taking a break"... until the director called me on the day of callbacks and asked me to come in and nail it. All I did was go in a belt the word "Tits" for 16 counts... I'm serious. And while I don't think I actually did nail it that night, the creative team was very nice and ultimately offered me the part.


Tssssssst!

What made me decide to squeeze in one more show before I take this break I've been talking about for months? Young Frankenstein was one of those films that I had watched from my early childhood on-- I was rattling off quotes from it when I was still in elementary school (without necessarily realizing just what I was saying- "What knockers!" "Oh, sank you, doctor", for example). There are so many moments in that movie that perfectly demonstrate the kind of comedy that I find funniest. Also, I love Madeline Kahn. LOVE Madeline Kahn. So when I heard that JCC was doing it, of course it caught my attention. But Shrek: The Musical really took it out of me-- I'm not sure how many people really know how much-- and with moving into our new house and all the
responsibilities I'm juggling at Geva this Spring, I knew that I was going to need to take a looooooong break. So I told myself I was done and I was totally cool and excited about that.

I also thought that I would be pregnant by now. I naively assumed that of course I would either be too tired/barfy to be able to handle it or too showy to be passable in any stage roles after Shrek. For months I daydreamed about being secretly pregnant during Shrek and then making a sassy end of the first trimester announcement at the end of my program bio- "Fiona marks Mary's last stage role for a while, as she is making her debut as "first-time mama" this Summer!" to explain my planned hiatus. Well, that didn't work out as planned.

So what's one more? The only 2 things that kept me from auditioning were 1) my tiredness after the grueling Shrek process, and 2) the hope that I would be "in the family way" by the time the show was running. Well, I negotiated with Danny (who, after playing Shrek, understood exactly what I was talking about with issue #1 and sympathized greatly) and made him promise me that 1) I wouldn't be called to rehearsal more than 2 times a week for the first few weeks of rehearsals, and 2) that should the family thing work out during the process, he and the costumer would be very kind to me and make the necessary accommodations both in physical demands and seam allowances. He heartily agreed and, having all my conditions met, I took the role.

Now we're less than a month away from opening and things are starting to move quickly-- next week marks my first real week of regular rehearsals and we start running the show the week after that. We had rehearsal last night and blocked my last song ("Deep Love"- look it up on youtube for a laugh). And I realized how truly tired I really am. Don't get me wrong, I love it and I'm going to have a crap-load of fun with this role. But it's time. I find myself getting really frustrated and irritable with myself in rehearsal, I'm having issues with my body on so many levels now, and all of it is causing me to be way way WAY too hard on myself. I need to streamline. I need to listen to my body. I need to rest and recharge and refocus. I've gotta stop and breathe.

So this is officially it for me for a while, friends-- come see me go out with a bang in Young Frankenstein at the JCC in May. And then, once I've had a chance to settle into life again, maybe I'll have some news on my next big role (whether it'll be on the stage or in a nursery, only time will tell).

(I vote nursery.)

Grandma Texas

My Grandma died yesterday.

We called her "Grandma Texas"; I'm not sure why. We never called our Grandma Tiballi "Grandma New York", but for some reason my mom's mother was always referred to as "Grandma Texas", even in the most formal of conversations. I think she really represented that place, that part of our lives, unlike anything else. Now that she's gone, I feel like she was Texas to me. As I think about her, certain little memories replay in my mind:

- a pink dress she made for me, specifically the fabric she used-- it was pink with a minty green leaf print that had a little bits of green glitter here and there.

- the wooden paddle that hung in her kitchen as a silent and permanent threat to any mischievous children daring to enter her kitchen while she was cooking. It had a skunk painted on it.

- the little glass crocks of candy that she kept on her kitchen counter. I actually think it was Grandpa Texas who kept them stocked with peanut butter cups and tootsie rolls, just so he'd have the pleasure of watching his grandchildren cautiously sneak to the kitchen threshold, hiding until Grandma's back was turned at the sink, and then quickly darting in to snitch a candy while she wasn't looking for fear of that skunk paddle on the wall. Now that I'm an adult, I have similar glass crocks on my kitchen counter. Every time I steal a piece, I am 7 again.

- the most incredible food you've ever tasted in your life. Specifically: biscuits, bacon (which she always served in a specific rectangular melamine bowl, which my mom gave to me recently), 2% milk served in curvy glasses, BBQ beef brisket, hushpuppies, pickles, salsa, and an orange cake that I still dream about. Grandma Texas was the one who taught me that measuring cups were optional and that good cooks "stir it till it feels right". She was fearless and masterful in the kitchen.

- waiting for her to get home from work at night. Grandma Texas worked at an old folks home when I was young and often her shift wasn't over until 10 or 11pm. We'd wait up for her to get home and then she'd sit at the kitchen table and smoke a cigarette (or several) and tell us stories about people we didn't know. It didn't matter- it was worth staying up for.

- the bright orange velvety rocking chairs in her den, where she and my Grandpa would sit for movie-watching. It was in this room where I was introduced to some of my favorite films of all time (or maybe they are my favorite because they remind me of being there). I remember watching Gone With the Wind for the first time there, which seemed like an event to me as a young child.

- her voice and her laugh. I just can't describe my Grandma's voice to anyone who hasn't spent time in rural East Texas-- it was warm, hilarious, utterly charming... like chewing on molasses. And she always had some zinger or sassy comment to make that would just land you flat on your ass. She was funny (and she knew it). And stubborn (and she knew it). I remember her laughing from her chair at the kitchen table, a cigarette in her long-finger-nailed hand, usually with an "awww, shiiii-et" thrown somewhere in the chuckling (in Texas, "shit" is a two-syllable word- always). She had a great sense of humor and people frequently drew comparisons between me, my mom, and my Grandma-- we were all three of us sassy, stubborn, proud, strong-willed women with the same lips and the same nose. I loved that.

There are tons of memories that I will cherish with Grandma Texas. She was an amazing woman and the absolute matriarch of my Texas family. She wasn't just my grandma- she was an entirely different world to me. Texas never be the same now that she's not there.

Look What We Did!

You guys-- it's been MONTHS. I am terrible at blogging.

Biggest development since I last wrote? We bought a house! Specifically, this house:

We live here now.

 

We officially moved in during February, right smack in the middle of my Shrek: The Musical run (mental note: do not EVER move into a house while you are performing the lead in a ginormous musical which requires exhausting physical comedy and the slathering of green makeup all over yourself-- you will be too overwhelmed to do anything correctly and will instead sit and cry tears of exhaustion and embarrassment). Fortunately, I married a nice guy who took the reins and somehow got it done.

 

Allow me to take you on a tour...

 

The living room, as seen from the front door.

 

Same room, as seen from the hallway.

 

The dining room, as seen through the massive archway from the living room.

Same room, as seen from the entrance to the kitchen.

My domain. So much beige...

... but new appliances, tile floor and backsplash, at least.

The downstairs bathroom. New everything.

The guest bedroom.

 

The "other" bedroom, hopefully soon to be inhabited by a small person.

 

The most glorious master bedroom you've ever seen in yo' LIFE!

Recessed lighting! New carpet! Exposed brick! Window seats!

The en suite. Jeliz?

What's that I see? More exposed brick?

We'll have so much room for pooping!

Nice and flat, fully-fenced backyard

I shall putter in this garage.

We've already undertaken some projects (for instance, that bright orange dining room is no longer bright orange... thank the heavens) and I hope to have some posts up in the next few weeks to show you all the little updates and changes we're making. My love affair with Home Depot has gotten more serious... I think what we have is FOR REAL, guys...